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When Small Changes create Big Changes

We are full of them, whether we realise it or not.  We say we have them, but more often than not they have us.  What is this thing I’m describing? 

They’re our Habits, and they drive our lives to the Nth degree, sometimes brilliantly, but many times not so and root us in a quagmire that can rule us moment by moment.  They are our regular tendencies and practices.  They are often unconscious and automatic. Although they can be impacted and influenced by Motivation (made up of Intention and Motion meaning to take action), they are more likely to drive Behaviour and Change than do Motivation by itself.

Habits are amazing when we are excited about learning something new and wonderful. They can enable us to cope with huge amounts of information, choices, decisions, goals and emotions.  Many of these habits are unconscious, directing behaviour like a conductor does an orchestra, but we are often unaware of this.  While good habits make it easier to achieve desired results without sapping our energy, undesirable habits make it difficult to achieve our wants, hopes and desires and will drain our inner resources.

Most of us do not worry too much about our habits unless and until they begin to create havoc and unhappiness in our lives.  At the start of a new year, you will hear words like “goals”, “motivation”, “resolutions” being spoken about like its going out of fashion.  It is a rare thing to hear others giving a platform to the idea of “Habits” and the role they play in keeping us stuck.  Yet again.  The emphasis is regularly placed on “willingness”,“motivation” and “resolutions”. 

It appears to be a little-known thing that “Willingness” and “Motivation” are states of mind which can embed a habit or not.  The fact that they are used to underpin a habit, means that the habit came first!  Indeed, Habits are known to change the structure of the brain and thereafter impact Behaviour. 

Willingness and Motivation alone are not known to impact brain structure, but Habits do. 

Repeated habits work like this; simply put, repeated actions cause your neurons to fire again and again, forming a stronger and strong neuronal circuit. Heard the term “Neurons that fire together, wire together”?   This comes from an evidence based theory called Hebbian theory, which showed that repeated actions created stronger neuron circuits, allowing us to do things on autopilot.

Now autopilot can be good, but only if these habits are not undesired ones.  The more a habit is performed, the stronger the neuronal circuits become.  Autopilot speeds up the transmission of signals, in effect making it easier and quicker for the habit to occur next time.  So, if you’re looking to embed new behaviours and release old ones, small changes in your Habits are a good place to start making changes so you experience the big changes you seek.

 

Want to learn more about how we can start making small changes to your habits? Book a free consultation call!

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A Magnet Called You: Understanding Abundance

You are a magnet, whether you choose that word or not, you are attracting or repelling certain things in your life.

The laws by which you choose to live your life is what makes you a human magnet; a person with a certain vibe!  Did you know that the word “vibe” is derived from the word “Vibration”. A magnet has a vibration, which attracts certain things to itself.

What you say Yes or No to determines what vibe you have, and what vibe you have determines the laws by which you choose to live your life.  The quality of your relationships, finances, creative expression, physical well-being and your state of mind are all impacted by your personal laws.

How do you hold conversations? Are they honest, genuine, guarded, open, loving, affirmative, uplifting, gossipy, complaining and erratic?  We all have the capacity to have conversations that hold any of those qualities, but which ones do YOU choose?  You see, whatever qualities .you live by, will attract your relationship group (that includes friends, lovers, acquaintances, colleagues).  It creates your “vibe”.  That is why some people will gravitate towards you and some people will keep you at bay.  So what qualities are you living by?

What personal laws are you applying which may hinder or accelerate your evolution?

 

Here is a mini Inquiry practice on Poverty Mentality:

I feel about money this way:

Stingy, Greedy, Hoarder (be honest and mark yourself out of ten with 10 being True and 1  being the false -the  furthest away from this).

Invest, Accumulate, Circulate((be honest and mark yourself out of ten with 10 being True and 1  being the false -the  furthest away from this).

 

Sometimes this practice may bring about a visceral reaction around money and affluence.  If you are honest with yourself may give you an indication of how you are presenting yourself to the world when it comes to money. 

Are you the magnet whose personal laws accelerate or hinder your evolvement?

Which laws are holding you hostage?

Ready to release your poverty consciousness? Contact me to find out more. 

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Sense and Senses

Sometimes we struggle to believe something unless we have proof of it through our five senses.   At one time in human evolution, the question was asked “are there forms of life that are smaller than the eye can see?” It did not make sense to us unless we could prove it through our five (limited) senses. So from that place the answer to that question was “No”.  There is always one who thinks out of the box and generally considered a troublemaker, so he/she did not accept the “No”, and a microscope was invented.

Another question followed, “are there things which exist that are smaller than can be seen through a microscope?”  Again the answer was “No”, but the persistent among us discovered the idea of atomic and subatomic phenomena.

What is clear from all of this is the idea that as tools were developed to disprove long held hypotheses, that which was once considered non-existent became existent; the main proviso required was an expansion of consciousness.  Suddenly we had some-thing come out of no-thing.

Could it be that lot of things we believe are not real are just in an invisible realm waiting to be discovered?.  History appears to tell a story of a willingness to rise above what our five senses are able to deliver.

If we are to view the willingness to step outside of this paradigm as requiring an expansion of consciousness, then it makes sense to treat our five senses cautiously?

We are more than what makes sense through the senses we are used to! Makes sense?

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Courage – An Embodiment Practice

Today I choose to be vulnerable. I am open to experiencing my vulnerability for I know it is the first step in practicing Courage.  I don’t need to go anywhere or do anything.  I give myself permission to feel deeply all the things I care about and commit to act upon them so I may have a life well lived.  I know that to live a life well lived requires me to access my vulnerability and in doing so I choose to be courageous.  As a Warrior on this journey called life, I know that there can be no courage without vulnerability.  So today I choose to be Courageous; with my beloved, with my future and with all manner of unknowns that draw me to new frontiers.  I am willing to break the dead shell of yesterdays, to risk even when I am terrified.  No risk No Courage. So, I risk – for the deep privilege of being and feeling fully alive.  I am willing to be courageous as I lose myself to find myself.  I choose to love myself by being courageous.

 

And so it is.  Amen!

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Fear and Courage

The Willingness to live our desires takes courage. 

From early childhood we are exposed to other people’s ideas of who we ought to be and how.  It is usually backed up by television programmes, school and friendships as early as playground playmates.  As a child our identities are primarily shaped by parents who perceive us in certain ways and treat us accordingly.  We may also be objects of their unmet or hidden ambitions.  We are read books with certain heroes or heroines.  The influencing, shaping and sculpting has begun.  We are inculcated into family patterns where we are reminded through old photographs, stories of what those before us did or did not do.  Psychologists tell us that by the time a child is 7 years old, their personality is formed.  He/she is now just a littler version of who he/she is going to be.  But is this mould really set like they say?  Is that it?

Are we our family?  Are we the result of relationships and friendships we have been exposed to and cultivated?  Are we our university alumni?  Who does the choosing?  The YOU that you have chosen or the You that has been shaped and moulded?  What if the life you have been influenced, shaped and moulded to follow is not the life you would have chosen for yourself?   What do you do?  What would happen if you leave the life you have built, the life you have unconsciously chosen and step forward to claim the life for which you have longed?

Often, we have inherited someone else’s view of who we are or should be.  I have watched this play out time and again in a number of families or friends as they describe their families. 

It takes real courage to stare into the deepest parts of yourself.  Are you willing to see what is TRUE, REAL and ETERNAL about you?  What do the deepest parts of yourself really long for?   You see, the part of you that is shaped, moulded and sculpted is your personality.  Your personality is not all of who you are.  The part of you who questions your choices, who longs to live a life of your deepest desires, who observes you in unexpected moments, that is the eternal part of you.  Some call it the Soul.  Are you willing to risk knowing who you really are?  Who you’ve always been?  Could you live with the consequences of knowing?  You see, all of our deepest desires are our Soul’s way of calling us back to simply being all of who we really are.

Each time I have allowed myself to “go there” I won’t lie and say it is easy.  In fact “fear” visits.  It feels quite palpable.  She sits in the corner wringing her hands as if to say “let see what you got!” My mind registers multiple “what ifs”.  I do not pretend to be unafraid.  I know that when fear visits, the idea is to have me not choose, to keep me stymied, catatonic so I remain the same.  But I would rather know myself and live with the consequences of these choices than to live a life making choices which have probably never been mine to make.

Sometimes I have made choices which have deviated from the status quo, from what others expected of me.  Whilst those watching have smiled seemingly supportive, I have sensed a lack of support, even anger.  I have, in the past, turned down work of a particular nature because it was inconsistent with who I thought I was and the overwhelming attitude from some have been “how dare you”.  I have sensed and learned that making choices in alignment with who I think I am, can disrupt others’ perception of who they think they are.  The negative energy emanating from those who disapprove for whatever reason makes me wonder whether I am holding up a mirror in which they can see themselves.

In any case isn’t that what we are for each other?  Mirrors! Should we be clinging to our so called powerlessness or unwillingness to change like a comfort blanket?  Is that supposed to let us off the hook of taking responsibility for our own lives? I suspect that those who choose to challenge inherited perceptions by opting for a different response to life, threaten the others carefully cultivated self-deception.

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